Despite Stark Warnings From China and US Military Officials Not to, Pelosi’s Going to Taiwan Anyway

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Nancy Pelosi was packing her bags for Taiwan as a gesture of goodwill and a fervent display of U.S. solidarity until her plans were abruptly changed for her. U.S. military officials were tipped off about her trip and told her to keep her butt home, simply saying “it’s not a good idea.” 

Biden mentioned Pelosi’s intended trip to reporters only one day following the Chinese Foreign Ministry’s comment that it would take “resolute and strong measures” should Pelosi show her face in Taiwan now or at any time during the near future.

Still bumfuzzled, and not knowing the trip had already been canceled, Biden said, “Well, I think that the military thinks it’s not a good idea right now. But I don’t know what the status of it is.” Quick… What’s your first name, Joe… 

The trip was scheduled as a make-up for the one she couldn’t take in April after testing positive for COVID-19. If she ever gets to go, she’ll be the highest-ranking U.S. diplomat to set foot in Taiwan since former House speaker, Republican Newt Gingrich, dropped by 25 years ago. 

Pelosi may not be boarding a plane in the next few days, but despite the Chinese and US military officials’ stark warnings, she’s going later this month anyway. For security reasons, Pelosi’s office never comments on her advance travel arrangements so they had nothing to say.

A spokesperson for the Chinese Foreign Ministry, Zhao Lijiang, could not have been blunter. He said Pelosi’s visit would “severely undermine China’s sovereignty and territorial integrity, gravely impact the foundation of China-U.S. relations and send a seriously wrong signal to Taiwan Independence forces.”

The longstanding “One China” policy between China and the U.S. recognizes Bejing as China’s capital and the center of its government. The policy only allows for informal visits to Taipei, whereas Pelosi’s visit would not be considered as such.

Lately, China’s been kicking dirt in Taiwan’s face and raising more of a stink over its resistance to the communist party. The Chinese have been teasing the Taiwanese with their military prowess in an effort to intimidate them into linking arms and singing Kumbaya.

Biden said he plans on ringing up Chinese President Xi Jinping within the next 10 days or so to try and hash things out. But should Xi not be in the mood for a rousing game of bingo, Biden’s aides are already researching U.S. tariffs to see if there’s anything left to throw at China.

Donald Trump already tried that tactic anyway when he imposed a 25% duty on Chinese products that totaled in the billions. It was intended to force the Chinese into adopting fairer business practices, but the lesson went unlearned. All it did is piss ‘em off further, but it did lower the U.S. deficit a notch or two so not all was lost.

Biden’s mind appeared to flicker when reporters asked him what he planned on saying to Xi. With a confused expression, he said, “I’ll tell him to have a good day.” Yes. He really said this.

It would be better for the nation as a whole if Biden stayed off of the phone and Nancy took a sleeping pill, but Tweedle-Dumb and Tweedle-Dumber, out of ignorance, are going to end up stirring a rice bowl full of noodles that could have resounding repercussions for every man, woman, and child on earth if China quits roaring and goes in for the kill.

Is it too ridiculous to think that little old Nancy Pelosi could trigger WWIII by taking a ‘vacay’ she’s been told by everyone except for Joe Biden not to take? Ponder the thought. It isn’t that far-fetched considering how it takes very little to knock the chip off of China’s shoulder. 

Whenever Pelosi hits the friendly skies, we’ll know about it. We’ll also find out what happens shortly after she lands… Don’t expect to be reading any good news.